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- Are you following studies?
- Do some studies yourself. Really!
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- Previous studies have found that studies funded by for-profit groups are more likely.
- Get funding.
- Get funding for your project.
- Get funding for your research.
- For your biology business.
- Get funding and even more good people will want to join.
- Get funding and grants.
- Get funding and advertising.
- Advertise like crazy. Go nuts.
- Advertise like mad.
- Like hell.
- Like the major companies.
- Advertise as if it were a big help.
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- Studies are easy to do. Really!
- Studies are easy to prepare.
- Studies are easy for inexperienced researchers to do.
- Studies are easy to carry out.
- Easy to conduct.
- Easy to present and interpret.
- Easy to understand.
- Studies are easy and worthless.
- Worthless and Demeaning.
- Worthless and damaging.
- Worthless But Fun.
- Worthless But We'll Sell It Anyway.
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- Studies Are Flawed.
- Flawed and Deceptive.
- Flawed but fascinating and relevant.
- Flawed but enjoyable.
- Flawed but powerful.
- Flawed but Admirable.
- Flawed but profitable.
- Profitable as well as Entertaining.
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- Studies Show One Third of All Studies Are Nonsense.
- Nonsense is the new sense.
- Nonsense is the new thing.
- Nonsense is strength.
- Nonsense is rewarding.
- Nonsense is right.
- Nonsense is free.
- Nonsense is a good way to waste time.
- Nonsense is a reflection on the State that supports you.
- Nonsense is a statement.
- A pile of crap.
- A useful force.
- Nonsense is a failure to impart meaning.
- Meaning is rather simple.
- Rather gross.
- Meaning is out of reach.
- Out of reach and out of sight.
- Out of control too.
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- Studies is about going nuts.
- About going beyond the limits.
- About Going Solo.
- Going Wild.
- Going Into Business.
- Going overseas.
- Going to War.
- Going on an African safari trip.
- About going barefoot.
- Going to the toilet.
- Going to sleep.
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- Studies are about programs.
- Programs Without a Standard.
- Programs without a significant increase in costs.
- Programs without a performance.
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- Studies are about creativity. Really.
- Creativity and naughtiness.
- Creativity and Psychoses.
- Creativity and Depression.
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- Studies are about cause and effect.
- What is the cause of my weight problems?
- What is the cause of depression?
- The Cause of Cancer?
- The Cause of Self-Interest?
- The cause of death?
- Of SARS?
- Of the mind?
- Of present day lawlessness?
- Of the ocean tides on the Earth?
- Of tuberculosis?
- Of birth?
- What is the cause of premature ejaculation?
- What is the cause of gravity?
- What is the effect of Vinegar on Honey?
- The Effect of Rising Interest Rates?
- The effect of the moon on tides?
- The effect of time on memory recall?
- The effect of industrial chlorine emissions?
- What Is the Effect of Maternal Cocaine Use?
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- Studies are about as valid as Claimed.
- Claim your own right to exist.
- Claim your own power.
- Claim your own exemption on your tax return.
- Claim your own incompetence.
- Claim the general inadequacy of reason to guide your life.
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- Studies Are About People Doing More Of The Same.
- More of the same old tricks.
- More of the Same Alarmism.
- More of the same bad news.
- More of the same, only worse.
- Worse But We Knew That.
- Studies are known.
- Known to exist.
- Known to occur.
- Known to be forthcoming.
- To be available.
- Known to have spanned the country.
- To have been carried out.
- To have been undertaken.
- Studies are known to the community.
- Known to play an important role.
- Known to be rigorous.
- To be quite reliable.
- Quite, Fairly, Rather, Somewhat reliable.
- Relatively reliable.
- Pretty reliable.
- Kind of reliable. Kinda. Sort of.
- Studies are known as epidemiological.
- Studies are known to have been tested.
- Are known to have reproductive rates comparable to those of some populations.
- Very few studies are known to exist which have any degree of relevance.
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- Studies are about teaching.
- Teaching whatever is believed.
- Whatever material is in the textbook.
- Whatever you already want to teach.
- Teaching for example how you deal with incidents.
- How you deal with encoding.
- With stress.
- How you deal with anger.
- How you deal in drugs.
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- Studies are good for teaching complex knowledge.
- As complex as you like.
- As complex as you feel comfortable with.
- As comfortable as you want to feel.
- As comfortable as you can imagine.
- As comfortable as you can get.
- Not as comfortable as when you are breathing.
- Not as comfortable as when you're drinking and driving.
- Not as comfortable as when you started masturbating in front of her.
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- Studies are good for some purposes.
- Purposes that cannot be removed.
- Purposes that cannot be wiped off by contracts.
- Purposes that will be free of taxation.
- That will naturally disgust.
- That will significantly imperil biodiversity.
- Purposes that cannot be considered charity.
- Charity is like a painkiller for a cancer victim.
- Charity is like sowing a field.
- A field of work that may not make you happy.
- Happy about your association with The fund raising companies.
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- Studies Are Often Wrong.
- More Wrong Than Previously Thought.
- Wrong because they will cost more than they actually raise.
- Wrong because they result in discriminatory practices.
- Because they punish people.
- Because they are evil in nature.
- Wrong because they bring shame, heartache, and deep regret.
- Regret at missed opportunities.
- Regret at not making a complete escape from law.
- Regret at letting expensive hardware just sit around and collect dust.
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- Studies have shown many benefits. Really.
- The benefits of olive oil.
- The Benefits of Molecular Manufacturing.
- The Benefits of Co-Sleeping.
- The Benefits of horse urine.
- The benefits of alcohol.
- The benefits of El Niño.
- The Benefits of Membership.
- The Benefits of Eggs.
- Of Milk.
- Of Globalization.
- Of Boredom.
- The Benefits Of Liberalising Product Markets And Reducing Barriers.
- The benefits of estrogen therapy.
- The benefits of ingesting colostrum.
- The benefits of chronic long-term stress.
- The benefits of laser science and technology.
- The benefits of stem-cell research.
- The benefits of weapons in space.
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- Studies have shown people listen to TV.
- Studies have shown that TV-inactivity makes children obese. Obese and criminal.
- Studies have shown that obesity increases risk for cancers.
- Studies have shown that cancer cells often have genetic mutations.
- That mutations are possible in rats.
- That rats deprived of sleep for 17 days will actually die.
- That they die quite painfully.
- Studies have shown that pain perception is reduced after exposure to comedy.
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- Studies have shown that emotion affects action.
- Studies have shown that action plans are beneficial.
- Beneficial when under a physician's care for paralysis of involuntary muscles.
- Beneficial for multiple sclerosis symptoms.
- Beneficial for others.
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- Studies Have Shown That Homosexuality is a Matter of Biological Determination.
- Studies have shown Gays traveled more often than national average.
- Studies have shown that Travellers often live in extremely unhealthy conditions.
- Studies have shown gays and lesbians are more likely to be smokers than heterosexuals.
- Studies have shown that smokers are simply less fit than nonsmokers.
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- Studies have shown that people in other countries are not any better.
- People in other countries are stupid.
- Annoying.
- Unhappy.
- People in other countries are talented.
- Talented for True Crime.
- People in other countries should learn to look after themselves.
- Should be encouraged to use a killing device.
- Should email us to determine shipping costs.
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- Studies have shown girls as young as six already feel dissatisfied with their bodies.
- Dissatisfied with sex or even sexually dysfunctional.
- Dissatisfied with studies of canon law in Bologna.
- Dissatisfied with studies of the Islamic sciences.
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- Studies have shown that studies show what they're intended to show.
- They're intended to show you that what may seem to be a difficult problem often has an easy answer.
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- Studies have shown that well-planned navigation can help boost online sales.
- Studies have shown that poorly-planned navigation can help ruin online sales.
- Studies have shown that condoms are 98% effective when used correctly.
- Used without disrupting service.
- Used without disrupting the color of the floor.
- Studies Have Shown Every Body Part Must Be Washed.
- Washed with Wine.
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